I struggle so much with failure attitude. I try to take responsibility for things I am responsible for. And sometimes I can take that sense of responsibility too far and it doubles back as a deep sense of failure.
And I am pretty hot under the collar this morning. I failed myself and Eric with a poor choice in hot sauce bottles. Yea. Hot sauce bottles.
I took a long time – like in terms of hours – sifting through the craphole called amzn (I won’t give them the honor of capitalization) for quality, USA made, bottles for my hard-won hot sauces. I mean, for crap’s sake (a mid-western term, I believe), I grow the peppers from seed starting in winter – right next to my desk, under lamps on timers; transplant them outside, lovingly coaxing them into full plants with just the right amount of sun/shade as they acclimate; taking the early blooms off so they grow strong; mixing special nutrients for them; picking them in early morning so they are sweet; carefully fermenting them on my kitchen counter; blending them until they are perfectly balanced; testing the pH levels, even. It’s is an estate product, 100%.
I take it seriously. It’s kinda my job at the moment. But not everybody takes their work seriously as I will get to.
Today. The day my carefully chosen bottles finally came in! Joy! Yay! I can put up hot sauce now! Not.
They were supposed to be made in USA. But when Eric brought the box up and put it on my clean dining table (where much food is produced), I could tell right away that it was NOT made in USA as it was touted online. The cheap-as-allgetout box had that distinctive odor of slavery and slack that comes out of that country. We all know what I am saying.
Poorly marked on the box “Designed in the USA”.
PISSED. EXPLATIVES. NOT GOOD THINGS CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH. And to add insult, it shipped from some freight broker out of Rialto, CA. I can tell you by experience, NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM RIALTO CA. Not a thing. It’s the playground for the devil.
Great. Now they get returned, reviewed, and my table gets sterilized.
AMERICA-WASHING HAS TO STOP. Dude, just be honest about your product. Majority people will buy it anyway,
I started blaming myself. I went back to the listing to see if I missed something. Nope. Stars and stripes all over the page:
Oh but wait. I did indeed miss it:
Well dummy me. (The highlight and the scratchout are mine. )
Another fail, Friday.
I think I am done wasting time on this marketplace called amazon. I spent all my budget on incandescent light bulbs this month anyway. And we have half a steer coming in soon and that will be another hit to my budget. I guess I am just putting hot sauce in mason jars this year and using a spoon. Again. Not cute. Grr.
And oh yea by the way. Why oh why are my peppers not turning red in the sun? In prior years I just pick them green and lay them out for a day or two to finish turning red. Now it’s just this burning on them – no lovely red:
And then the squash bugs and ants in my long necked Italian squash. Fornicating all over it. Laying their dastardly eggs to destroy any chance at lovely cool weather soups made from my squash.
I feel better now. This is all just a whine. It’s all handle-able and not really a big deal. I can buy squash if need be, and I am for sure returning the bottles.
But I am tired of being lied to. That’s probably why I got so hot about them bottles. And the wanton squash-bug-fornication didn’t help.